Come visit my new hosted blog at: http://masterkey.dominica-eyckmans.com/
Please click on the link, and then hit the green ‘Submit’-button on my home-page there to receive updates of my latest posts. (this blog-site here is not updated any longer).
OK, writing as an act of persisting right now, I have to admit — I am unbelievably tired, but I planned to write my blog today, and therefor I do it, now, and I promise to write it in the ‘right’ state of persisting.
I am curious about the outcome as well.
WHAT is she all about now? — you might probably ask.
This week we started the make-over and had to choose and start with the number one quality we thought we needed to develop/work on the most. OK, I read the list, and a few were jumping to my attention, and to make a ‘clean cut’, I decided to do a ‘blind pick’, the same way we picked our PPNs way back in the beginning of the course.
And, MUCH to my surprise, ‘persistence’ was the one that came out.
So we had an assignment for the weekly blog…. watch one movie out of a list of six given, relate and link it to the course, and write about it.
A few weeks ago, actually Week 11, during the sit concentrating on ‘Whatsoever things ye desire (…) believe that ye receive them and ye shall have them’ I had an insight about one of the goals in my DMP that ‘got hooked’ into my consciousness. I didn’t talk about it then, because other stuff was going on as well that was more ‘important’ at that time, and also, actually as it turns out because that particular insight I want to talk about now needed some time to ‘incubate’ further.
WHAT a week that has been…. up-down-up-down …. 8 …
I have lived through SO much, discovered and uncovered, bumped into, nailed and failed, laughed my heart to pieces and cried my heart out, trembled for tremendous fear and tremendous thrill and bliss, had incredible fun and incredible heartache, went all the way down and more than I knew was possible up, down again into other depths, and up again to the top of yet another high, couldn’t sleep because of panic and tremendous worry, and couldn’t sleep because of tremendous bliss and joy and sense of the most profound accomplishment I ever had, was able to surrender to my highest self one day, and wasn’t the next day, and the next day managed to just let it all go again, found my power and could apply it and got paralized by fear the next day, was almost choked by panic one moment and found immense liberty of (creative) expression the next, managed to sacrifice my ego one day, and got sacrificed by and to my ego the next, and back, felt connected to all and everyone and felt completely isolated and cut off, felt my most glorious possible way of ‘being me’ and for a split second thought about making an end to it,
persisted doing all the readings and exercises in despair and managed to also persisted during the highest joy, stayed faithful to the MKMMA and wanted to throw it all out of the window at one point — but luckily didn’t — had fantastic insights and equally ‘fantastic’ incomprehension, felt more ‘me’ than ever before and ‘not like me AT ALL’, loved to a point where I thought my heart was going to explode and hated myself to an extend I didn’t know I was still capable of.
In short: what a glorious week, especially for someone who wrote in her DMP that ‘being passionate about my deep, intuitive and EVER EXPANDING insight in the human soul, mind and body (…..) fills me with a deep sense of joyful accomplishment’ ….. be careful what you wish for … 😀 ….
…..And yes, the joyful accomplishment won, also in regard to most of the other goals in my DMP that got all ‘touched’ more or less specifically this week — and even two of the events mentioned in my Press Release …. yes, HAVE BEEN MATERIALIZED 🙂 …
And oh, for a girl that wants to end up living in the mountains: who needs mountains outside when you have the ‘Himalaya-in-square’ inside your soul to travel through….. or oh, since I live in them inside very consciously, I will soon live in them outside….. yeeha… 😀 (oh, but note to Self: ‘hmm well, the Pyrenees will do, thank you very much… 🙂 ‘ )
One thing troubled me though, couldn’t get the mechanism behind the ‘one day I succeed, and the next I don’t, and back and forth, why can’t I get a grip on that? WHAT is this about? And WHY?’….
Good thing I stumbled on MarkJ’s video about the retreat today, just before starting my blog: keyword: ‘detachment’…..
When I look back: the times I succeeded, I somehow ‘instinctively’ had managed to detach from the outcome, and the times I ‘failed’, I was actually fearfully attached to a specific outcome…..
well-well, what a week.
Lots of glimpses of insights have been popping op all week long. Popping up, and disappearing again in the turmoil of the extremely hectic days, where about every hour some person or event also popped up in my life “to play it’s role”, being “the role I designed for them”: being my teacher. Every single one of them in it’s own specific way, but whit only one ‘function’: pointing out my most vulnerable spot, and so from very different angles: fear.
Thanks to last weeks blog of a fellow-‘student’ in the MKMMA, Tobie Steyn, I suddenly realized that what I saw as my biggest ‘downfall of ages’, was not fear in itself, but what was behind that fear, what was covered by it.
I started focussing on what that might be, and yes, there it was: another blind spot, maybe the most blind of all.
It occurred to me that I designed my life to dish me over and over again situations that frighten me — and those are MANY, just luckily for me, I have always been just that tiny bit more brave than frightened (yes, beside being a Unicorn and a dolphin, I’m a feline: I am Og’s lion, and I persist, even with wounded paws’n’all, throughout my life, but SO afraid underneath….).
So I started focussing on the fear, trying to figure out what the common fear was behind all the different anxious reactions on seemingly various situations.
I realized that the bottom-line-‘thinning’ deep down behind it always was the fear of being ‘destructed’, of being ‘scattered’, ‘crushed’, and in some way always by ‘bigger forces’ — authorities, or trucks, or….
Then it struck to me that I do (still) have a minor tendency to self-destruction.
And then, during a sit, contemplating on the ‘whatever you pray for, believe that you receive it and you shall have it’, I realized that I had to start ‘accepting’ what I’m desiring — and that I know that I actually already have — my full potential, ‘my HearzFlower‘. And the main thing I ‘pray’ for, is the power, over myself.
For what reason am I resisting to accept that power into my being, my cells, my life? The first obvious answer would be ‘because you are convinced that you do not deserve it for some reason’. But no, that didn’t sound ‘right’, that didn’t ‘click’.
What DID click? …. ‘you are afraid of that power because you associate it with destruction, you are afraid that if you have that Power, it will Destruct you’. So there you have it. Fear, plain, blind fear of my own power.
And, as within, so without: that’s why I created all those minor and less minor events since all my life: I projected my fear for my own power on some ‘authority’ that threatened to ‘destruct’ me. And I was like a mouse or a hamster inside a cage, running in it’s wheel, on and on, no escape, the wheel of PDF: ‘Power will Destruct you, Fear it and run if you want to survive’…..
I guess it’s time to destroy that wheel now, I HAVE the power to do that.
…thanks a lot to all my teachers, events and people, in particular the ones of this week… 😉 …. I’m already designing other, far more joyful jobs for you 🙂
Actually, I’m installing a new version of a PDF-wheel: one of Persistence, Determination and Faith. Ah, and one of Power, Devotion, wheel of Fortune. 🙂
Last month has been an extremely intense month, with a professional dead-line at the very last day — a deadline I created shortly after getting into the MasterKey: finishing a composition for viola, voice and string ensemble.
I DID it. In time. As programmed.
The whole process was incredibly intense and in an almost magical way completely aligned with the whole MasterKey -program so far, with what I wanted to accomplish for myself when I started it: completely incarnate and structurally integrate my full potential.
Because without doing that, I would go nowhere. For me it’s not about learning about or getting into any kind of spirituality, that has been with and inside me since the day I was born and conscious not long after that.
No, for me, the real challenge was to bring all this wisdom and ‘knowing’ into the flesh, incarnate it, so that I can USE it here ‘on earth’. ‘Getting conscious the other way around’ so to speak. That has been my biggest challenge all my life, and I lacked the tools to really do so.
Now I feel that I have them, those tools, and the actual composition, “Essence”, that I just finished is proof of that. I finally DID it, and made it concrete, I finally incarnated that creative part of me , by incarnating the sounds in my head in actual notes on paper that will be played on december 16th. (I had composed before, but more in a kind of ‘aloof’ way, and never before for such a ‘big’ setting).During the process I could feel my soul almost literally taking more and more possession of my mind and body, and I could ‘see’ that happening during the meditations, the ‘battle-ship’-sequence, and especially the ‘flower’-sequence…. ‘downloading my Hearzflower’…. and all this is reflected in the piece — in a way, it even reflects my whole DMP, sound-wise and symbolically.
I dedicated the piece to the MKMMA-course, by the way, and after the creation of it, in two weeks, I definitely will post a recording of it in my blog.
And now, since december 1st, I went into a state of ‘incubation’ as it seems, ‘rest’, and ‘reset’, (apart from OF COURSE celebrating the accomplishment 🙂 ) .I need SO much sleep, and even more ‘turning inwards’, no spectacular insights or stuff like that (‘by coincidence’ there not being a webinar and Haanel’s sit-instructions for this week being piece of cake for me could not be better timed…..) but I feel that I have to give my system time, space and most of all rest to ‘incorporate’ everything that happened ‘tornado-wise’ the last few weeks. So that everything can be ‘reset’, not to a previous state, but re-set in the sense of prepared to go to the ‘real starting-blocks’… ready for what is to come … welcoming that new state of being, and gathering the (new) energies to dig and root even deeper now, and most of all create, and start living the life I always wanted to live. Somehow it feels like I finally am born. Born into myself, by myself.
I am most definitely curious about what comes next…….
…. more than ever I wish for you, dear reader, to be able to open up your ‘energetic WiFi-channels’ to be able to look and feel directly into my head and energies…..
‘Act is the blossom of thought’ says Haanel, and the ‘sit with the flower’, aiming to visualize a flower from the very seed until the fragrance…. well… I will try to put it into words…. my very Essence, ‘my HearzFlower’ ….
Immediately right into the first sit I saw a figure made out of light, ‘me’ in my purely energetic form, that gave a rosebud to a little version of ‘me’. Little me was asked to pick a seed out of the rosebud.
‘But how will I know that I take a good one? Won’t I miss out on certain things by choosing?’….(oh, this sounded like something I almost choked on when I had to write my DMP… 🙂 ) Then it occurred that all information is within ALL seeds, so I just could not make ‘a mistake’, it was simply up to me to grow it into what I wanted it to be. Aha 🙂 . So I confidently picked a seed.
Once in my hand, I saw that it was a RainbowMarble, of course… 🙂 … as well as a pearl — all shimmering with the rainbowy-mother-of -pearl-glow…
I decided to not plant it in a pot, no, I took it to ‘my’ beloved mountains, where I plan(t) to live one day. Once it was in the ground and little me comfortably installed next to it, enjoying the scenery and the calm time and magical energies of the place, I saw that that place was at the same time my Solar Plexus. I had planted the seed in my Solar Plexus, where also my Aladdin’s lamp is living — the place where thoughts get materialized…..
As I watched the little seed develop, it started to look like a white bean, and thus also like an embryo, and in a split second I was inside my mother’s belly…. all at the same time of still being in the mountains under the sun. Different parallel worlds, energetic dimensions at the same time. The embryo of course also looked like a little whale, and, ‘bam’ (yes there is the famous MasterKey-expression 🙂 ) all ‘my’ animals where there too, inside me. Lovely.
As the bean started developing roots in the mountains, those roots had to dive into all different existing colors in my Solar Plexus, first all shades of red, then orange…. all the time accompanied with the sounds ‘that belong to the colors’ (sorry, can’t say it otherwise), taking the time they needed to take what they needed. (now THAT is an insight to the utmost importance for me 🙂 ) … I knew that I was not going to get to the complete flower that day, nor probably the next, so I agreed to take a week for it, to absorb the full spectrum. Bravo, Dominica….. 😀 … I could energetically see the full flower as a garment around me, but in a fade, non-material shape. At the moment, I am still a bean with roots and a little stem with a few dense green leaves. ‘Aha, hold the thought, cultivate it, and the matter WILL follow. By the end of the week, the flower will have materialized’. Nice 🙂
While this was going on, I could physically feel my body being filled and ‘materialized’, filling up gaps where there were some frequencies missing — I’m downloading, incarnating, my full potential, and integrating it structurally — into a mother-of-pearl-white, fragrant rose: me. (well I like that better than being a battle-ship 🙂 ). I’m about half-way, to be continued…. but I can already smell the mesmerizing perfume…
And during the process a lot of images appeared about ‘root-systems’: when you look at a tree, the root-system below the earth is the mirror of the crown of branches above the earth, ‘the crown is rooted in the sunlight….’ and the stem transports the information both ways: the matter out of the earth up, the energy out of the sun down; the nerves/bloodvessels in a brain look like a root system, and are mirrored in the Solar Plexus, in a way, and with the Nervus Vagus as the stem in between; and when you tilt a tree 90°, it actually looks like two brain hemispheres, with the stem being the corpus callosum, … So not only as above so below, also as above/below so right/left, all rooted one in the other and linked with a two-way stem, as within so without… SO many many bridges exchanging and linking information on many levels, and linking dreams and reality in all kinds of directions, so…. IS there a difference between dream and reality…? Which is which? Does it matter? It all feels just as real to me, once the connections have been solidified and are properly nourished, when the wonder lamp is properly rubbed.
Thougths ARE reality. Thoughts are the mother of reality. The holy grail. Accept the full responsibility that comes with that.
Reality is structurally integrated, fully incarnated, aligned thoughts (or you can have them, and therefor it, as scattered as you like….your choice….). The stem? The feeling that accompanies them.
Funny coincidence: just 2 days prior to this, I got deeper into fascia, and started to do Rolfing-therapy…. which is just that, structural integration. And all this came about because of something in my Plan Of Action ….
And in the mean time, I’m still residing inside myself, energetically inside my mother — becoming my own mother, in a way, and inside mother earth, all being the same places, absorbing the energies that I need to manifest my essence, rooting on several levels and in all frequencies to grow my crown. On my way to be born again, as me.
This seems the perfect opportunity also to present you my mother, the one who created the beautiful art-work that have been so miraculously ‘fitting’ into my blog-themes so far…
Just wanted to share this ‘little miracle-story’ that happened actually before I had the insights I talked about in my main Week8 post.
Last monday, immediately after my very first sit ‘with Haanel’s boat’, and when it had become clear that the boat was ‘me’, I had to go to an appointment.
Because of some situation with a neighbor, I ended up starting my car a few minutes later than I had planned. Drove off, and because of the delay arrived at a bridge across a canal that is used by ‘transporting-boats’ just at the time that the traffic-light at the bridge went red (nice, one of my PPN’s displayed 🙂 ) and I had to stop and wait, because the bridge has to be elevated for the boat to pass. This usually takes quite some time, so I decided to take good use of that time and went into my thoughts about MasterKey, the webinar of the night before, my sit with Haanel’s boat…..
Just before I arrived at that bridge, I was listening to the radio, and the anchor-woman suddenly started talking about how she had observed a little girl dancing and jumping down the street safely at her father’s hand the previous day, and she added a bit melancholically ‘with an innocence as if she still believed that this was how it was going to be for the rest of her life.’
‘Well yes’, I thought immediately, ‘actually, why would that NOT be possible?’ And linked that girl to my own inner ever-dancing-girl…
So that’s when I arrived at the bridge, and a beautiful piece of guitar-music called ‘Innoncence’ started playing on the radio, and I dove into my thoughts as mentioned above, about all this and ‘me’ being ‘a battle-ship’ (ah, or probably a dancing battle-ship 😀 ).
Then the bridge was up, and the boat arrived, and passed by very slowly from right to left right in front of my eyes (I had front seats 🙂 ), and suddenly, when she was right in front of me, I saw her name, painted in big white letters on it:
‘NUEVA VIDA’ , New Life…..
Once again, I walk tall among men and they know me not, for today I am a new woman with a Nueva Vida.
And once again also, I am profoundly grateful for this numerous moments of ‘sacred timing’ I experience following my inner compass.
Together we can change the World
I wish that every human life might be pure transparent freedom - Simone de Beauvoir
Welcome to your new home on WordPress.com
master key experience
Espen’s MKMMA experience
Nothing is permanent . Rien n'est permanent
MKMMA...people you know who you are..this course changes your outside from the inside and changes it BIG TIME!
work in progress...
My experience in the "Masterkey Master Mind Alliance" MKMMA